Understanding Inner Attention: A Path to Emotional Awareness
Have you ever noticed how you're constantly aware of your inner experiences - feeling anxious before a presentation, or bored during a long meeting? This natural awareness is what we call "attention inward." While we all do this automatically throughout our day, there's a deeper, more intentional way of turning our attention inward that's used in therapeutic approaches like Somatic Experiencing. This specialized practice can reveal insights about ourselves that usually remain hidden.
In a previous post we talked about attention out. In this post we’ll talk about attention in.
Have you ever noticed how you're constantly aware of your inner experiences - feeling anxious before a presentation, or bored during a long meeting? This natural awareness is what we call "attention inward." While we all do this automatically throughout our day, there's a deeper, more intentional way of turning our attention inward that's used in therapeutic approaches like Somatic Experiencing. This specialized practice can reveal insights about ourselves that usually remain hidden.
How Emotions Guide Us
Dr. Mark Solms's research helps us understand that emotions aren't just feelings - they're sophisticated guidance systems that help us survive and thrive. Think of emotions as messengers carrying important information. When we feel sad, for instance, that sadness is telling us we've lost something meaningful. More importantly, it's guiding us toward natural ways to heal: crying, seeking comfort from loved ones, or taking time for self-care.
But what happens when we can't follow these natural emotional pathways? Maybe we grew up learning that "big kids don't cry" or that showing vulnerability is weakness. When this happens, we develop coping mechanisms - like pushing the feeling away, distracting ourselves, or rationalizing why we shouldn't feel that way. Over time, these coping strategies become so automatic that we mistake them for our natural responses. It's like creating a detour around a blocked road and eventually forgetting the original route altogether.
A Different Way of Paying Attention
This is where intentional inner attention becomes valuable. By carefully observing our internal experience, we can reconnect with our authentic emotional responses that have been masked by years of coping strategies. Somatic Experiencing offers a helpful framework for this kind of attention through the SIBAM model:
Sensations: Physical feelings in your body (butterflies in your stomach, chest tightness, warmth, tingling)
Images: Mental pictures or memories that arise
Behaviors: Natural impulses to move or react
Affect: Conscious emotional experiences
Meaning: Our thoughts and interpretations
In our thinking-focused culture, we often jump straight to meaning-making - trying to analyze and understand before we've fully experienced our emotions. However, if we can learn to pause and first notice our bodily sensations, images, and impulses, we often discover clearer and more authentic information about our emotional needs.
This patient, body-first approach helps us bypass our habitual coping mechanisms and reconnect with our natural emotional wisdom. By learning to pay attention in this way, we can begin to untangle the difference between our authentic responses and our learned coping strategies.
Finding Peace Through 'Attention Out': A Simple First Step to Feeling Better
When you're feeling overwhelmed or stressed, your first instinct might be to dive deep into your thoughts and feelings. While this is completely natural, there's actually a gentler way to begin your healing journey. It's called "attention out," and it's simpler than you might think.
In another post we talk about attention In. In this post we’ll talk about attention out.
When you're feeling overwhelmed or stressed, your first instinct might be to dive deep into your thoughts and feelings. While this is completely natural, there's actually a gentler way to begin your healing journey. It's called "attention out," and it's simpler than you might think.
What is "Attention Out"?
Think of your attention like a flashlight. You can shine it inward (on your thoughts, feelings, and body sensations) or outward (on the world around you). Both are important, but learning to focus outward first can help you feel more grounded and safe.
Why Start with Looking Outward?
When you first come to counseling, you might want to jump right in and talk about everything that's troubling you. That's completely normal! But starting with "attention out" first is like giving your mind a gentle reset button. It helps your body recognize that right now, in this moment, you're safe.
How to Practice "Attention Out": A Simple Exercise
Here's a simple practice called "orienting" that you can try right now. Orienting is a part of a larger instinct for safety called, the threat response cycle.
Find a comfortable spot to sit
Let your eyes wander naturally around your surroundings
Notice what catches your attention - maybe it's a color, a shape, or an object
Don't worry about why something catches your eye - just let your gaze move freely
Try to set aside your thoughts for a moment and just focus on what you see
What You Might Experience
When you practice this, you might notice some natural changes:
Your breathing might become deeper
Colors might seem brighter
Your body might feel more relaxed
You might feel more present in the moment
These are all signs that your body is finding its natural balance.
Why This Works
Your body has a natural ability to heal and find balance. Sometimes it just needs a little help remembering how. "Attention out" is like giving your nervous system a gentle reminder that it can relax and reset (Levine, 1997; 2010).
Remember: This might feel strange at first, and that's okay! Like any new skill, it takes practice. The key is to be patient with yourself as you learn this new way of finding calm.